Posted by Kathleen (24.87.82.211) on August 18, 2003 at 16:58:25:
Dear Joseph,
I am in a very large dilemma over my current relationship and was hoping you could offer some insight.
This man and I have been dating for about 4 months and even though we have an awesome connection, he keeps pulling away and seems to be afraid to commit. We are both older, so the usual problems of commitment and youth aren't relevant here. He recently asked to take some time to evaluate his position in our relationship, but since then an old flame has the potential of coming back into my life and now I am faced with a terrible decision between the two. Do I wait for my first guy to figure out his stuff, while possibly giving up the potential for another relationship? I REALLY love my first guy and feel like he is the first person to ever truly 'feed' my soul, but what if he continues this lack of commitment and I end up waiting for nothing.
My spirituality also comes into play here, as my first guy is a different religion than I am, however we are both on the same page sprititually if you know what I mean by that. God is playing a large role in both of our lives right now, and is responsible for my guy deciding to question his level of commitment and what it means. I am trying hard to listen to God's answer for me in this one, but nothing is coming to me.
Here's where I hope you can offer some guidance. I know you can't answer my question for me, but I thought maybe you would get an intuitive feeling one way or another.
I would appreciate any advice or direction you can give me.
Warmest Blessings,
Kathleen