Posted by jerry (24.83.3.58) on January 12, 2004 at 22:22:43:
Recently I met someone who gave me some tapes that seem to make a great deal of sense about my existence. The core premise is basically Buddhist: that everything - literally everything - is an extension of thought.
Having had been interested in spirituality for quite some time, I am or was quite familiar with this notion. Somehow though, the meaning behind this message never really 'sunk in' quite like it did this time around. I believe I am well on the way to experiencing a kind of Copernican paradigm shift of the mind.
What I'm moving away from are all vestiges of the notion that reality is a construct of God or random chance - a pair of models which ultimately disempower me because ultimately, every outcome must be attributable to some H/higher power; I can bend reality a little but that's about it.
As I return to this notion of a thought-derived universe, I look back on my past mystical experiences from a very new angle. One outcome of this is that I, for the first time ever, feel a justification for prayer. In the context of the thought-based model, I see it as nothing more than the consolidation willpower and ideas, which [the tapes say] lead to an intensification and quickening of the manifestation process visavis the clarity of the idea and the magnetic power of the emotion-will. This is very different from a point that I got stuck on for several years: as a believer in God, it made no sense to me that an 'all-loving' God would require prayer in order to Act in our lives, and in fact I thought if anything this kind of causal chain made God to be a bit of an Egomaniac.
Anyway, in reflecting on this model, I am recalling various mystical episodes I had in the past, when, - and probably in accordance with my own unique past - I felt I was 'walking in Spirit', in 'Krishna Consciousness' etc. One thing that was so fascinating that these mystical episodes shared in common was that the 'fabric' of reality assumed a rather curious character:
In normal awareness, the dominant perspective is physical first, imagination second. By that I mean, my sense of causality is 'normally' that outcomes are governed by chains of events that can be explained in terms of things like physics, science, or mundane human social and psychological 'laws'. From this standpoint, the 'anomalous' 'nonordinary' episodes typically represent to me minor acts of Intervention by God, his angels and various other spirits. The mind, or the imagination, at best can bend reality, but ultimately they are - pending Interventions - subordinate to the physical etc laws in determining outcomes and manifestations. However:
From the way I clearly recall thinking from WITHIN these experiences, what governs reality is not physical at all, but rather something far more mental or spiritual in nature. During this times my sense of certainty that this is THE LAW is very firm. It will probably come as no suprise to you, Joseph, that from within the sublime portholes of my own perspective I have seen an acceleration of things that defy normal expectations, which thereby reinforces my sense of the validity of this 'inverse' reality: that mind, not matter, truly governs reality. From this point of view I am completely and utterly convinced that this is the right way of viewing the world, which takes on some of the character of a dream - a much more malleable reality, defined by the double-edged sword that is nothing more than awareness.
Why mention all of this? Because, until getting these tapes I had assumed - coming from the perspective of 'normal' consciousness, with a bias towards a God-centered cosmos - that these mystical episodes had been ordained and the fact that I generally did not experience them meant that God didn't want me to experience more of them, perhaps beause I was 'unworthy'. From this persective, of knowing what was possible but being resigned to the notion that what's possible was denied, the memory of 'what was' was almost too painful to bear. The best analogy I can offer is what it would be like for a blind person to have his eyes opened for a few times over the course of a lifetime; might it be better to not know what the world looked like when you were 'destined' to be denied that vision for the bulk of your years?
But now, according to these tapes, it seems that if I want to bring these mystical memories back into the present, I need only identify that desire and work towards it.
I was wondering if you could comment on all of this, and, if possible, if you might suggest any techniques or support groups around Vancouver where people who are interested in attaining this same end gather. The tapes speak most generally about 'getting what you want', but beyond the generalities they don't get specific any particular desire. My desire is very simple: to be able to find the Intangible Groove and to return to it whenever I want for as long as I want to. Any suggestions? [Drugs are NOT and option!]